Gratitude

My car engine blew up last week, and I still don't know if it can be fixed. That's the car I just bought with the insurance check, after my old car was totaled. My paycheck is the same as it was in 2008, and I was struggling then. I've been watching the news too much, and its been breaking my heart. So I had to do a gratitude list.

First, I am grateful for every student I have ever taught, and most especially for the "bad" ones. After all these years I've realized that I'm usually the problem, or that it is a teaching problem and not really a kid problem. But I have learned vastly more from my students than they could ever learn from me.

I've learned that kids have big hearts, that they want to learn, and that they are as broken as I am.

I've made so many mistakes, as a teacher and as a person. Teaching has made me more human and more compassionate.

I've learned to love, or try to love, every student that comes into my room. There is something to like about each one of them, and I start from there.

I'm grateful for the wonderful, innocent decision I made to have children. My daughters are a gift.

I'm grateful for my sweet husband, who makes me feel loved and cherished every day.

I'm grateful for books. Books have given me countless hours of immeasurable pleasure. I wouldn't be the same person without books. I am that woman who always has a book in her hand, and there are times when, if I couldn't bury myself in a book, I would have gone to a very dark place.

I'm grateful to these brothers: Ralph Ellison, Richard Wright, James Baldwin, James Alan McPherson, Kiese Laymon and others who speak the truth about their experiences in this country.

If you are reading this, I'm grateful for you, dear reader. It still cheers me that my words and ramblings are read and sometimes responded to.

Here's hoping that each one of you will enjoy love and happiness and the comfort of companionship, wherever and however you celebrate tomorrow. Peace.